For Better or For Worse

My husband and I have been married for more than 30 years.  Along the way we have been through many ups and downs. Some easy, happy times and some very hard, devastating times.

Although we are the same people we were when we married, we’ve both grown and changed over the years. So if you think you’ll get used to your spouse after a year or two and then it will be happy camping after that, allow me to burst that bubble.

I used to hate avocado but I love it now. I used to be a sun bunny but due to repeated episodes of skin cancer, I now prefer the shade. I’ve changed a lot during our years together.

My husband has changed as well. I am still amazed at new things I learn about him.  His likes and dislikes. His personal preferences, you might say.

For example, he likes to sit in booths at restaurants. He drives slower when he’s talking. He doesn’t like waiting in lines. He piles mountains of parmesan cheese on top of his pasta.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband with a passion. But when they say love is a choice, they mean it. The same things he might do that make me smile and say “ooh, I just love that man” one day, may be the very same things that irritate me the next day. But I wouldn’t want to live a day without him!

It’s interesting how God puts people together, right? They say opposites attract. Look at your marriage for instance. Don’t the two of you have some traits that seem like two sides of a coin? One of you is often late and the other is often early. You are a morning person and your mate is a night owl. Your husband is quiet and reserved while you “never met a stranger”.

As strange as it is, I think that a husband and wife who have some opposing tendencies can really be used by God. They complement each other. Where one might be weak in an area, the other can take up the slack. It forces us to become more accepting of differences, don’t you think?

In Genesis, God told Adam that it wasn’t good for him to be alone, so He created Eve to be a helpmate for him. When we look at it that way, maybe God wants us to find things to do that will be a help for our husband. Fill in a gap for him instead of pointing out where he may be lacking.

Many of the changes I’ve seen in my husband have been positive. As he has grown in his walk with Jesus, he spends more time in the Word and in prayer, is more devoted to me and our children, and he has become more caring of others.

I encourage you to appreciate the differences in your spouse. Even the ones that drive you crazy sometimes. God made him. And if he is following Christ, God will continue to bring about wonderful changes in him.  This week, look beyond the temporary annoyances in your Mr. Right and see the amazing man that God has given you.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”  Genesis 2:18 NLT

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