Early this year I was feeling low, surrounded by thoughts of being undeserving and unaccepted.  This is a deep place that I find myself in from time to time. Although I knew that God was with me, my own negative voices made it hard to hear God’s whispers of love. I decided to take a few days away to be alone and spend time in prayer and the Word to see if I could hear from God.

After settling in to where I would be for the next couple of days, I sat on one side of a couch that faced a wall of windows.  Normally I would be looking out on a beautiful scene, but today the sun was completely obscured by clouds making my surroundings appear dark and dreary. I began to pray. “God, do you hear me? Are you here with me?”

Suddenly, the sun dipped below a cloud and shined a brilliant light – right where I was sitting! In that moment I felt God speaking to my heart, “I see you and I love you”. I opened my eyes and looked around the room and to my surprise, the bright sunlight was only on my spot on the couch.  Had I been sitting anywhere else in the room I might have missed God’s personal message to me!

Now before you decide that I’m a crazy woman, let me tell you that I didn’t hear an audible voice. And there were no angel voices nor orchestral cadence that accompanied the sunlight’s appearance between the clouds. But it was a very real tangible moment. A very clear connection from a God who loves all of us and wants us to know that He sees us.

That experience reinforced to me that even when I feel far from God and I can’t hear Him or see His movement in my life, He is still there, waiting for me to draw close to Him so He can show me that He sees me and loves me.

I’m reminded of a story I heard as a child, back when cars had bench seats in the front (Google it – it really was a thing). The story goes like this: A man and woman were newlyweds, and they were very much in love. They sat glued side by side in the car; any closer and she would have been in his lap. They talked about everything. They laughed and cried together.  Sometimes they just sat in silence next to each other feeling the love between them. They were almost inseparable. Fast forward about 30 years. One day the wife, who now sat in the car on her side next to the door, said to the husband, “We never talk anymore. We used to sit so close. I don’t even know if you realize I’m here in the car with you.  You just seem so distant.” To that the husband replied, “Who moved?”

The moral of the story – if God seems distant and you don’t feel that He even knows you’re there, realize that YOU are the one who has moved away.  He’s always there wanting you to move closer to Him.

If you are feeling far away from God today, stop what you are doing and ask Him to help you move closer. He sees you, He loves you, and He wants to draw you nearer.

Seek God while he’s here to be found, pray to him while he’s close at hand. Let the wicked abandon their way of life and the evil their way of thinking. Let them come back to God , who is merciful, come back to our God, who is lavish with forgiveness. Seek God while he’s here to be found, pray to him while he’s close at hand. Let the wicked abandon their way of life and the evil their way of thinking. Let them come back to God , who is merciful, come back to our God, who is lavish with forgiveness. Isaiah 55:6-7 

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