I’m thinking of writing a book. The title would probably be How to Drift Away from God, Ten Easy Steps to Living Life on Your Own.
Just kidding. But that’s how I’ve been living lately and I just have to admit it.
I’ve been going through a season of depression and at times I felt hopeless. Add to that, some things have happened in the lives of those I love most that are heartbreaking and beyond my control. And to top it all off I’ve been fighting physical illness for the last two months. During that time instead of leaning into God, I have been slowly inching away from His presence.
Instead of trusting God to guide me, I am living in my own strength, making poor decisions based on my lack of eternal perspective, and just basically drifting.
This is me being completely honest and transparent so that maybe…just maybe if you find yourself in a similar place, you will do the opposite of what I have done.
Here are the “10 Easy Steps” I have taken to separate myself from God.
1. Skip your Quiet Time today because you “just don’t feel like it”. After all, your time with God is all about your feelings.
2. Fill your time with the things of this world instead of the things of God. If you can distract yourself with social media, online shopping, or other time-wasters, you’re less likely to notice the God-shaped hole in your heart.
3. Keep your eyes on your circumstances, not on your Savior. If you take time to look up instead of at your situation you’ll never figure out how to fix things yourself.
4. Let physical and emotional pain keep you from community with other believers. They don’t understand all that you’re going through anyway. It’s better just to stay home.
5. Feed your fleshly nature with whatever provides temporary satisfaction instead of feeding your soul with things that will eternally satisfy.
6. Stay focused on yourself and what you are lacking to be happy. Because if you aren’t happy it must be because God hasn’t given you something you asked for.
7. Pray less, and when you do pray, if things don’t change for you right away, believe that your prayers aren’t getting answered because God doesn’t care about you.
8. Read the Bible less, because it is really dry reading right now. You’re not getting much out of it anyway.
9. Don’t seek out Godly counsel. They might encourage you to keep praying and reading your Bible and having your Quiet Time (see #1, 7, 8).
10. Whatever you do, don’t trust God’s unconditional love for you. Don’t give it a second thought.
Obviously I’m not really encouraging you to follow this list. Just the opposite as I said. But from my experience, it’s easy to let these things slowly creep into your life. Then you wake up one day and wonder why God doesn’t seem there for you.
What’s hard is to choose obedience to Him when I don’t really want to. It’s tough sometimes to keep my focus on Christ instead of what’s around me. I hope my next post will reveal that I’m moving back toward God, His refuge and provision, because that is where I belong. Stay tuned!
Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me. John 15:4
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